Chaz Cardigan – Not OK! Lyrics

Not OK! By Chaz Cardigan

18 with a hammer at my senior prom
ripping couches in the basement of a country club:
That was my first panic attack,
I knew couldn’t get my youth all back.
I got a temper from my old man, used to black out
then I started drinking liquor til my cash ran down.
I was living in the house with the band
Couldn’t pay rent, couldn’t keep a job, didn’t have a plan.

Some days, man I’ve got it all together.
Most days though I’m just trying to get better.

Everybody’s got that something
we can’t fix with love or money.
Even when it pulls me under,
get so high that it just seems funny.
How many times can I fake it
before it breaks me, I’m not okay.
I’m not okay.
Everyone feels like they’re crazy.
Why can’t I say it? I’m not okay.
I’m not okay!
I’m not okay.

23 and skipping obligations
for some fake crush when I start to lose my patience.
I get stoned on going too fast,
and what a rush when we finally crash.
I know a little bit more now than I used to
but at the cost I payed, I’m pretty sure I got screwed:
I spent a few nights sleeping in my car,
took it too far a couple times getting kicked out of the bar.
Some days, man I’ve got it all together.
Most days though I’m just trying to get better.

Everybody’s got that something
we can’t fix with love or money.
Even when it pulls me under,
get so high that it just seems funny.
How many times can I fake it
before it breaks me, I’m not okay.
I’m not okay.
Everyone feels like they’re crazy.
Why can’t I say it? I’m not okay.
I’m not okay!
I’m not okay.

Maybe when 50 I’ll figure it out,
get my s--- put together in a nice clean house.
Maybe that’s a pipe dream.

Everybody’s got that something we can’t fix with love or money.
Even when it pulls me under,
get so high that it just seems funny.
How many times can I fake it
before it breaks me, I’m not okay.
I’m not okay.
Everyone feels like they’re crazy.
Why can’t I say it? I’m not okay.
I’m not okay!
I’m not okay.